Wednesday, April 28, 2010

More bullets

-- Nursing. It's going... well, not horribly, I suppose. We have greatly reduced the supplementation, the twins are only getting an ounce or two extra before bed. They are epic diaper fillers with awesome weight gain (they were each up 10 ounces in 6 days at their last check-up, the pediatrician wanted at least an ounce a day), and really we could stop that little bit of formula altogether without harm to them. But not without harm to me, as the twins are impossible to soothe at that time of day otherwise -- and my supply as well as my sanity are at their lowest to survive it. Nursing newborn twins can really take a toll, let me tell you. I am hopeful that eventually we'll get rid of the supplementing altogether. In the meantime, I'm just trying to stay zen as we figure all this out. And with the appropriate amounts of under-eye concealer and ice cream sandwiches, I actually appear successful at that.

-- Sleeping. This is going horribly. My bed, once a comfortable prison of endless crappy television viewing, now teases me with its crisp white sheets and unfulfilled promise of rest and relaxation. I snuggle under the covers at the end of the day, let out a giant sigh of exhaustion, and drift off into a blissful sleep... that lasts no more than 60 minutes at a time. Basically I am awake for one hour, feeding both the kiddos and changing their diapers, and then I am asleep for one hour until the next cry starts the cycle again. And that's the best case scenario, if they go back to sleep after eating and don't want to stay awake and play for several hours, which happens as well. Some twin mommies have recommended sleeping in shifts with DH to get a longer stretch, but I don't see how that would be much help while breastfeeding. If the boys didn't wake me with a loud cry every couple of hours, my girls would anyway. And because of my supply issues, I'm not able to pump in advance so anyone else can feed them. As I wait for things to improve, I'll just stick to complaining and groggily threatening to give the babies away to the circus in the middle of the night (or so DH told me in the morning). But the kicker? I'm still watching tons of crappy TV while I nurse throughout the wee hours of the morning. Much to my own surprise, I'm a big Bret Michaels fan now. Be careful, those shows can wear you down.

-- The mall. It's as incredible as I remember it, after all these months. Hallelujah.

-- DH. I didn't mention this last time, but when the twins were 8 days old, DH developed two stress fractures in his right foot. He has been in an air cast ever since with instructions to take it easy, lest he develop a full-blown broken foot. Good timing, no? This leaves me 95% responsible for night duty, considering I'm the only one of us who can lactate or walk. He swears he doesn't know how it happened, but I'm not sure why the hammer was on the kitchen counter the morning after it developed. Well played, DH. Well played.

-- Twins. When Bean was a newborn, it was difficult for me to enjoy it because of all my new mommy anxiety. After finding out we were pregnant again, I was looking forward to feeling more confident with my baby and (hopefully) having a better time of it. Then came the news that it was twins. I was disappointed thinking that I would once again be overwhelmed (for a different reason this time) and would miss out on early bonding again. I am surprised to say that hasn't happened. Although having twins is much (much, much, much) more difficult than a singleton, I am enjoying it quite a bit. Because I am nursing for what feels like 22 hours out of the day, I get plenty of one-on-one time to stare lovingly at each twin. And they are so adorable together, smacking each other with uncontrolled limbs and trying to suck on the other's elbow. When we go out with our double infant stroller, we are swarmed by women who are biologically compelled to ooooh and awwww. I kinda feel like Britney Spears or Lindsay Lohan with the paparazzi constantly following me. Without the head shaving and crotch flashing, of course.

-- Bean. He continues to be a rockstar with the babies. When he's tired, he does have flashes of jealousy (wanting me or my Mom to put down a baby to snuggle with him), and he did cry when we wouldn't let him climb in the infant swing earlier today. But overall, he continues to amaze us with his sweetness. This kid is pure gold. And he does the dishes. No you can't have him.

-- Pictures. Only slightly lower on the list of Difficult Things to Do with Twins beneath "sleeping" and "breastfeeding" is "getting a good picture of both of them." They can't even crawl out of the shot yet and I still had to fight the urge to drown myself in Puget Sound while trying to get a decent picture for their birth announcement. DH found the outtakes quite hilarious, and perhaps he is right. Now that I finally got one that I deemed acceptable (not posted here, watch your mail!) I suppose I can laugh about it too.



Mrs.Spit said...

It's good to hear from you. Even the outtakes are adorable!

K said...

awww (and LOL) about your hubby's foot an the mysterious hammer. I hope he feels better.

The kids are all soooo adorable.

I'm glad to see you posting despite the hectic schedule you have. I dont know how much I'll be online once I'm getting ZERO sleep- maybe that's why I'm posting so much these days, lol.

Kristina P. said...

Oh, look at those cuties! And your poor husband! And you! Hope he heals up soon.

Kate said...

You're doing so great. Takes me over an hour to feed and pump for one.

E said...

Glad to hear you and babies are doing well despite the very, very hectic schedule you are on!! Bless your heart!

Your husband's foot couldn't have come at a worse time!! I hope it heals fast.

It is hard enough to BF one NB much less two.

I hope things get a little easier for you soon and the sleep fairy comes your way ;)

Michele said...

Things get better, I promise! In the beginning with Bobby and Maya at home, sleep wasnt something that we got until about 2 weeks in. 2 weeks after that, they were sleeping through the night.

I laughed about your B. Spears reference. I totally get that! I got stalked in the supermarket yesterday!

Mary said...

You are doing SO SO SO well, I am amazed!! Like previous commenters have said it gets WAY easier, you are in the thick of it right now. Hang in there friend and keep up the GREAT work!

Expectant Duck said...

love love love the outtakes.
Good to know what we've signed up for in the twin department!

Coffeegrljp said...

The photos of the twins are freakin' hysterical! That looks like the kind of thing you could only photo-shop! Truth IS stranger (or funnier) than fiction.

I cannot imagine the sleep situation. Oy. It is one of the things that I dread (even with just ONE new one). At least we know that eventually they do start to sleep in longer stretches. ha ha. Coming from the lady who *just* managed to get her 2 year old to sleep for more than 4 hours straight at night - *again* - this is ironic no?

Martha said...

The boys are so beautiful!! I would like to Borrow Bean for playtime, but I think I would have to Keep your Mom!! Thinking of you all w/<3.

Anonymous said...

So sweet! I can just imagine your Blog when they start running around.

Beautiful Mess said...

I'm sure it was VERY frustrating trying to get The One picture, but goodness are the outtakes adorable! Too funny!

I'm SO glad things are going smoothly-ish. I hope the boys let you sleep and give your breasts a break, but without effecting your milk production. not sure if that's possible, but I'm thinking if I go BIG on wishes, you'll get something!

Tell Bean I said he's an AMAZING big brother and to keep it up!

lisawitt said...

was so happy to see a post today and that you are all hangin in there! bfing so impressed, you go girl! bean looks adorable as always too. and oh my goodness...even though they are outtakes, i think the twins look adorable! cutie patooties!! :)

Mrs. Gamgee said...

So happy to see a post from your corner of the world...

I adore those pics! They're the kind you keep until they're 17 and then make sure all their friends see.

Hang in there!! I hope it gets mellower soon.

Nicky said...

Wow, you are doing FANTASTIC. Sleep will start to improve soon, honest! I absolutely *hated* when people told me to take naps during the day during those early weeks, so I won't mention it. :)

Anonymous said...

You go girl! It sounds like you are doing awesome.

As for supply - I have to eat a ton and drink a ton of water - I mean a ton. If I try to eat less to lose the rest of this weight, my supply plummets. If I do not drink enough water, my supply plummets. I cannot even tell you how much I drink - it is a ton. Not sure if this would help you or not.

Our twins will be 8 weeks old on Wed - I do pump and they are able to be bottle fed by others so I am able to sleep more - but even if I could not, they are going 4-5 hours between feedings at is amazing. We kept to a totally strict schedule - unless of course they were hungry before a feeding - and it seems to be paying off.

I also hired a night nanny two nights a week - my dh was in the hospital for four days recently and is having knee surgery on may 17 - and I go back to work june 2...sigh...very depressed about that.

You really sound like you are rocking it hard - btw - I lurked for quite some time!

MrsSpock said...

OMG. Sleeping in 60 minute increments sounds dreadful indeed. Just the 3 hour stretched I remember from J's newborn phase sends shivers down my spine. I have every intention of hiring a night helper if we can conceive #2- sleep is one of the only ways I can control my fibro pain.

And the boys are so very cute!