Two weeks

In a mere 14 days, my son will be ONE. As in, a YEAR old. TWELVE months. I will be the mother of a one-year-old child. I keep waiting for that to sink in, but it hasn't happened yet. I guess my dogged focus on a to-do list that can't be to-done allows me to leave that milestone firmly in the "denial" category for now. But my acceptance or no, he continues to grow and learn.

• Growing. He looks a lot bigger to me, I am anxious to hear his height and weight at the doctor next month. On my unreliable bathroom scale, he's at least 20 pounds. If this is true, I'll be able to turn his carseat around to face front on his birthday. Although now that the time is near, I'm considering holding out. It's safer for his neck if he's rear-facing during a crash. I'd be curious to hear your thoughts on this either way.
• Talking. No official first word, but he's definitely soaking up the language. I'm thinking his first intelligible utterance might be a toddler's interpretation of "Evey" or "light," as those are the objects he seems to recognize most. Although I swear today he said "mama" when he was in his high chair. But then as soon as I started celebrating, it turned into "mamamamamamamamamamamama" so maybe not. Oh, the ups and downs of motherhood.
• Walking. He is so much steadier on his feet these days, cruising the furniture and roaming the house holding onto my fingers. He's getting braver, he'll let go of whatever is steadying him and balance for a brief moment. I doubt he'll walk on his own before his birthday, but that dreaded thrilling day is not far off...
• Sleeping. Naps are still going well overall, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Occasionally it takes me a couple of tries to get him down, but it always happens. I have also started night weaning him. After I put him down, I don't go in to nurse/comfort him until 4 am at the earliest. He cried a bit at first, but once he realized I wasn't coming in, he'll just fuss for a minute and then go back to sleep on his own. I still wake up constantly, but I'll eventually get used to sleeping again. I'm hopeful that if I can get in at least one uninterrupted 4-hour sleep cycle each night, I might actually be able to increase my brain power to... say... 35% of what it was before giving birth.
• Eating. We are finally starting to get the hang of eating finger foods. Hooray! No more 7 hour waffle-eating marathons. It's still a slow process, but more of the food is ending up his mouth in a steady succession. (As long as it's not a green bean.) I need to start getting creative with his meals now that I am more confident it won't entirely become dog food. Bummer.
• Nursing. We are two weeks shy of my one-year breastfeeding goal. It's amazing to me, I couldn't imagine getting here when we first started. It was so difficult, and I'm really proud of myself for hanging in there through the tough times. As it got easier, our success really helped me get some confidence that I was sorely lacking. I'm not really sure how much longer we'll go... I'm following his lead for now. (Plus, I need to justify that wonderful nursing bra I just got from Victoria's Secret. I wonder how many months of savings on cow's milk for him would equal $44?)
• Reaching. Bean spends 95% of his waking moments reaching for things. Mostly those things he is not supposed to have, like scissors and super glue and flame throwers. Maybe one of these days we'll finish hanging the decorations in the nursery so I can get the power drill off the floor in there.
• Sharing. Be still my beating heart, I just melt when Bean holds out a piece of string cheese for his mommy. True, he likely held it out for the dog first, who no doubt licked it eagerly, but it's the thought that counts. Right?
• Screeching. Apparently there is a banshee inside of my son, and it demands to be heard. This discovery is my least favorite in Bean's development so far. This kid emits the most ear-piercing screams I have ever heard in my life. If you are too close, your ears will actually pop (I'm serious!). Excitement, frustration, boredom, anger, contentment... any emotion whatsoever elicits a shriek. I try to remind myself that it's healthy for him to explore self-expression and communication, but my nerves are sometimes very raw at the end of the day. That goodness for his early bedtime, decaf coffee, and DVRed home decorating shows.

I wish I had some better pictures to share, but we haven't been doing much that is picture worthy. He will be having his first haircut on Saturday, thanks to you voters and two different women on a recent outing who referred to him as a "her," so hopefully that will yield some interesting shots. In the meantime...

My little jail bird.

Bean and Evey set to the serious task of emptying the bin of baby accessories.

His new favorite face to make, scrunching his nose and breathing quickly through it (followed by giggles). Surely not a comment on my cooking.

He loves to smack the spoon out of my hand when he's had enough. Too bad he doesn't equally love to take baths.