Fatty fatty two by four

I did something horrible and stupid the other day. But first, some quick background. In early July, we will be heading to the lovely mitten state to baptize Bean at DH's family church. He's going to meet his aunts and uncles and great-grandparents etc. for the first time, we all can't wait. Anyway, I was thinking about what to wear to the baptism. I have this Ann Taylor dress that I bought last spring to wear to some weddings, and it would be perfect. I remember it was a bit loose on me back then, so I actually believed there was a chance it might fit me now, even with the baby weight. You can see where this is going. Well, lo and behold, I couldn't even zip it up. SOB! I checked the tag: size four. How deep is my delusion that I actually thought this dress might fit me? Scary. I blame sleep deprivation. My days of being a size four are sadly gone forever, although it's worth it to be this little guy's mommy.

So now I am faced with a problem. My stomach apparently thinks I am still four months pregnant. Meanwhile, the weather is warming up, and since most of my maternity clothes are for fall and winter, I have absolutely NOTHING to wear. Really. Nothing. While in the past I might have dreamed of throwing out my wardrobe and replacing everything a la What Not To Wear, I didn't really mean it. I'm wondering, how long does it usually take to lose the preggo belly once the baby has made his exit? I realize I'll still have some extra pounds, but the muscles still have some tightening to do at 10 weeks postpartum, right? PLEASE? If you have had a baby and can remember how long before your stomach no longer looked like a deflated balloon, please respond in the comments. You don't need a google account to leave a remark. Or just email me if you like that way better. And be honest, I need to know before I hit the mall. In the meantime, Netflix is sending me Postnatal Power: the Tae Bo Workout. Not only will I be getting back in shape, but I'll be able to kick some ass too. Awesome.

In other news, we are going to try day care option #2 for Bean. His last day at his current center is June 6. Hooray, only 10 more drop offs and pick ups! Then we have found that precious person who loves kids enough to work for peanuts, and she'll be coming over to our house to stay with Bean while I work in the office. (No, my mom is not moving to Seattle, although we'd love that.) We are still running background checks and calling references, but it's looking promising. I've also reduced my hours slightly to three 7-hour days so I'm just above 20 hours a week. This new arrangement will potentially save our breastfeeding relationship, as Bean's been consuming a bit more in day care than poor old Bessie can pump during the day. Thank goodness for freezer stashes. The best part of all this, of course, is that I get to see this sweet little face any time I want to.

I considered staying home full time, but when it came down to pulling the trigger on that, it just didn't feel right for me for some reason. My mom told me to trust my gut, and my gut was telling me not to let go of my job. I work from home part-time providing assistance to families who relocate with corporate transfers. Can it get any more perfect for me right now than that? Having it all: take two.

Our house hunt has picked up considerably since switching real estate agents. He really is an expert in the area and was able to direct us to some neighborhoods that we hadn't even considered yet. I'm afraid that "firing" our last realtor must have given the impression that we are difficult clients, because he seems to be going out of his way to please us. (I mean, who could believe that our first realtor would be unresponsive to a buyer in a market like this?) I've tried to be as easygoing as possible, but since he's given us third-row seats to a Mariner's game, I'm thinking maybe it will pay off to play the fussy, hard-to-please wife after all. Fortunately, considering my email goof last week, he has a good sense of humor. He shared this web site with me, and I recommend you check it out when you need a laugh. Click on "photo galleries" and then the various numbers. The captions are priceless.

Last but not least, my grandma had surgery earlier this week, so please pray for a speedy recovery. She's doing great, but a few extra get-well-soons never hurt. I wanted to take a picture of Bean for her hospital room, and I will share the photo shoot below. Maybe you had to be there, but all those faces... he cracks me up.

And... we're done!

Another tag: Fun things

I was just tagged by Kathy to list some fun things about myself, so here it goes. (I was also tagged by Mary last month, but that one is much harder, so it's still in draft form. I'll try to finish it soon.)

Here goes!

Four things I did 10 years ago:

1. Graduated from high school at the top of my class. You decide: wasted potential, or brilliant avoidance of pesky high-powered career?

2. Temped as a administrative assistant at a State Farm Insurance claims office. In a moment of panic with a confusing multi-line phone system, I accidentally connected two customers with each other instead of with their respective claims adjusters. Upon realizing my mistake, I shut down the switchboard for five minutes because I didn't want to explain what happened to the customers when they called back. (Doesn't say much for my high school, does it?)

3. Watched the series finale of Seinfeld with DH. Didn't really get that whole jail thing. We still watch the show every weeknight at 10 pm on channel 11. I pretend not to think it's still funny, but DH knows I'm not really laughing at something else I was thinking about.

4. Sustained a head injury and spent three months in a coma. Okay, not really. But since I'm having trouble remembering anything that happened 10 years ago, I may as well have.


Four things I did 5 years ago:

1. Moved to St. Louis for DH's job. I swore it would be the first and last time I moved anywhere I didn't want to go. WRONG! But I grew to love the 'Lou, with its muddy rivers and affordable housing, and now I already appreciate that I never have to shave my legs due to the mild temps of the Pacific Northwest.

2. Hired into my current employer, where I trained to become a Certified Professional Resume Writer. Five years and hundreds of resumes later, and my own resume still sucks.

3. Abandoned my journalism career before it started to pursue my interest in counseling. Luckily my dad still hasn't mailed me a bill for my $120K bachelor's degree. But I made up for it by offering each family member a mental health diagnosis and funneling my journalism training into a blog. Totally worth it!

4. Learned that I am definitely a "hotel" person. DH took me to a bed and breakfast in Missouri's wine country for our first wedding anniversary. Great idea, but I felt like I was at my great-grandma's house and ended up whispering the whole time. Not really the romance either one of us was hoping for.


Four things I did yesterday:

1. Sang my original song "Someone's Got Poopy in His Diaper" to a delighted Bean while changing his diaper. (To the tune of "Someone's in the Kitchen with Dinah." Lyrics available upon request.)

2. Googled the difference between fennel and anise. When we tried to get fennel at the grocery store on Sunday, all we could find was a veggie labeled as "anise" that we had previously purchased under the label of fennel. Of course as we were checking out, the clerk asked what kind of veggie it was so he could ring it up. We told him we weren't sure. (Yeah, we had "any random unknown vegetable" on our grocery list.) Another clerk was able to give him the correct code. As we grabbed our bags to leave, our clerk called to us, "Good luck with that vegetable!"

3. Pretended to understand DH when he explained the new group rotation plan that he and his boss have developed for him at work. I may not have had any clue what he was saying, but he was obviously flattered and excited by the plan, and that's all that really matters to me!

4. Fell asleep watching the movie Dune. DH is no longer allowed to select movies for our Netflix rotation.


Four shows I love to watch:

1. So You Think You Can Dance. New season starts May 22. Watch it!

2. Top Chef. I may not like to cook, but I love to eat.

3. Family Guy. A little low-brow humor never hurt anyone.

4. People's Court. It was a loan. No, it was a gift!


Four things that make me happy:

1. Going on a date with DH. Luckily it's not the only thing that makes me happy, or I'd be rocking some hardcore antidepressants.

2. Helping people. I do it for selfish reasons -- it feels good. (It's obviously not for the pay!)

3. The feeling of ultra clean teeth when you leave the dentist's office. Especially after a bubble-gum flavored fluoride treatment.

4. And last but definitely not least, my heart reaches new levels of happiness every time Bean smiles at me.

THE END!

Happy Mother's Day

Even with Joey the Devil Dog peeing on the carpet twice this morning (anyone want a dog? free to a good home), I've had a lovely Mother's Day so far. Bean made me a picture at day care on Friday...


... DH made pancakes for me this morning (and is going to treat me to a spa day soon)...


... and my Dad sent me a beautiful (and hardy so I don't kill it) plant to commemorate my first Mother's Day with Bean.

I even got a card from the pooch! How thoughtful. And the rest of the day promises more fun -- Joey's parents will pick him up, praise the lord, and DH is taking me to the restaurant where I went into labor just over two months ago. And of course, we'll get a chocolate covered marshmallow from Godiva for dessert! No rushing this time.

I wanted to take a moment to send a Happy Mother's Day to...

... my Mom, who never stops giving to her family. She doesn't even know how incredible of a mother she has been for the past 28 years.

... my Mother-In-Law, who not only raised the most wonderful person I've ever met, but who has always encouraged and supported me.

... my Grandma, who raised four successful children, spoiled seven fabulous grandchildren, and now lives life to the fullest at 80+ like it's the new 50.

... my Grandma-In-Laws, two women with huge hearts and infectious laughs.

... my Aunts, who I really enjoyed spending time with while growing up, whether we were headed to Boblo Island, decorating Christmas cookies, or enjoying homemade bear bread.

... my "in real life" friends, who are such amazing mothers that it's intimidating to me (keep the advice coming, ladies).

... my online friends, who kept me sane and connected during the most difficult time in my life, and now help me celebrate my greatest triumph.

... and to all the women currently on the bumpy road of infertility. Someone told me during my treatment that I was already a mother, because a mom by definition is willing to go to any lengths for her child, and that's exactly what I was doing. So whether at the end of your journey you are a mother to your biological child, your adopted child, your pet, or your DH (you know we all are sometimes), Happy Mother's Day, mama.

Doggy day care

Speaking of day care, we are dog sitting this weekend while DH's coworker and his wife celebrate their anniversary at a B&B in Oregon. They have a Jack Russell Terrier named Joey. He's an intense little dog; he's already destroyed two of Evey's toys after being here a few hours. Watch your back, evil squeakers! He also sleeps under the covers at the foot of our bed. I was worried that he would suffocate, but he sure enough, he survived to wiggle himself out this morning. Nothing like having your legs licked by someone else's dog while you are sleeping. Ewwww! The dogs get along really well; as always, Evey shares her toys and treats without so much as a yip. They've had a lazy morning so far. Joey settled behind the couch (which we moved away from the wall because the dogs kept trying to jump onto the kitchen counter).


Evey saw Bean in this pose while he was waiting for his daddy to take him to day care...



... and decided that the boppy pillow was the place for her.


Then Joey chose a new place in family room -- sitting on top of the back of this chair (I don't have a picture of it, see the black circle):

This has long been one of Evey's favorite spots in the house, so it must be extra cushy. Unfortunately, this also warps the back of the chair, so Evey knows that she's not allowed up there. (Which doesn't stop her of course; she just waits until I go upstairs. Then I hear her jump down when I come down the stairs, only to find her standing next to the chair and looking at me with innocent eyes as if I won't notice the huge smoosh on the back.) Anyway, as soon as I shooed one of them off the chair, the other one would jump up. In order to actually be able to go back upstairs to work, I tipped over the chair like this.


Next time I came down, I found this:

I give up.

Day care pictures

It was a little easier yesterday to drop off and pick up Bean at day care. I think having a day to cuddle with him in between work days is a big help. We are still exploring our options, but at least we'll be reasonably comfortable while we make some decisions. The teacher emailed us these pictures of Bean enjoying the cloudy Seattle day. Is he a stud in the stroller or what?!

Also a quick review of the Amby Baby hammock for anyone who's interested. While I don't think I'd go so far as to call it a miracle -- he's still not sleeping through the night, that would be a miracle -- it's definitely been a big help to me. During the day, he'll actually take a nap in it, instead of immediately waking up as he does when I try to put him down anywhere else. We've also been successful in getting him to sleep in it for at least part of the night. I miss having Bean next to me in bed, but I'm loving the cuddle time with DH. I wish we had it when he was a newborn, we'll definitely use it right away if God blesses us with another baby. Here's a couple pictures of my sweet little man sleeping in the Amby as I type this:

I think the dog is jealous

I was searching everywhere for Bean's binky. It was in his car seat just an hour before. Then I heard the swish of the doggy door. In pranced the pooch, who boldly dropped something on the living room carpet.

This is a binky.

This is a binky on Evey.

Any questions?

Know when to fold 'em

We folded with our first realtor and let her know we are officially moving on. She was heartbroken. (Actually, she said she was "relieved." But let's pretend she was heartbroken, because I don't like what she's implying. We are easy clients, really!) Anyway, we got another referral, and I'm impressed with him so far. He happens to have the exact same name as a famous country singer, which has caused much delight and embarrassment around our house. Let me explain.

Immediately caught up in the spirit, I downloaded "The Gambler" from iTunes and have been singing it for several days now. My mom asked if I giggled when the realtor introduced himself. And DH joked, "I can't wait to ask him how we know when to walk away, and when to run." Yesterday I got an email from the realtor, and in his professional signature block, directly under his name, there is a small line that says "...not the singer!" I smiled and immediately forwarded it to my mom, saying I thought she'd get a kick out of that, and sharing DH's humor on the subject. A few minutes later, I got a response to my email... from the realtor! I had accidentally hit "reply" instead of "forward." *doh* Are there any songs about crawling under a rock?

Yesterday was my first day back at work. Which really means my first day back to spending time in the spare bedroom wearing sweats and using the desktop computer. Just as I suspected, it was wonderful and horrible at the same time. DH was traumatized leaving Bean at the day care in the morning -- when I spoke with the director and the teacher later, they both said all the teachers were worried about him after he left. Meanwhile, safely at home away from that part of the experience, I enjoyed my 8 hours of "freedom." (Since when is working considered freedom? Wow, I've changed a lot!) I actually got 4 loads of laundry done and picked up the house while sorting through 378 emails and conversing with actual adults about grown-up concerns. I thought about Bean all day and couldn't wait to go pick him up, but it gave me something fun to look forward to rather than feeling like a terrible panic. However, when I arrived at the day care center, it was my turn to be traumatized. Bean himself was napping and immediately smiled when I picked him up. The teachers are very nice and the center is lovely. But the sight of all those babies with just a couple of caregivers -- I nearly barfed. So far this is NOT having it all. DH and I were up late last night talking about alternatives. Our first mission is to try to find someone to come to our house and watch Bean while I work upstairs. Most important quality: must love babies. Second most important quality: must be willing to work for peanuts. Know anyone?

I would be remiss in not pointing out this article, which documents what DH and I have said for years... first borns have it harder. It's a plight, really. A downright plight. DH and I are both first children from families of all middles and youngests. Oh what injustices we have endured! We are now accepting gratitude from our younger sibbies for "exhausting" our parents into relaxing the rules. You're welcome. Will it be different for Bean, who is the first born of two first borns? He's obviously at high risk for a type A personality and an anxiety disorder. I wonder how the dog fits into the birth order equation, as really it's her who gets away with murder around our house. Her most recent scam is to sneak out her doggy door with household items and strew them across the lawn, from Bean's stuffed animals to dry erase markers to my breast pump.

Speaking of Bean, he had his two month check-up today. Two months! He's now officially been alive longer than most Hollywood marriages last. He weighs 12 lbs 10 oz and is 23 1/2 inches long, both in the 75th percentile. Way to go Bean! The pediatrician switched his GERD medication, so hopefully that will help more with the reflux. He was a champ throughout the appointment and while getting his vaccinations -- the doc said she can't imagine that he's ever fussy. I plan to give her a call at home this evening to prove otherwise. He's hitting all his developmental milestones, too, which is fabulous. Smiling, following objects with his eyes, turning his head to look at us, cooing, and holding his head up for a brief time. His new favorite pastime is looking at the white tag on the bouncy seat and cracking up. I'm not sure if I should be worried that he's more interested in that than the bright green turtle hanging next to it, or proud that he's already showing an aptitude at reading, just like his mommy. It really is a hilarious tag, what with the "Made in China" and care instructions and all. Maybe I'll figure out how to post a video so you can share the fun. (Let's hope he gets his technology aptitude from his father.)

Now I have a prayer request -- very sad, read on at your own risk! One of my coworkers is 30 weeks pregnant. I have reason to suspect she struggled with IF, although we've never talked about it. About the time she found out they were expecting, her husband was diagnosed with aggressive cancer. He recently passed away at home after being in hospice care. I cannot even imagine how horrible this must be for her, life is so difficult to understand sometimes. Prayers up.