Friday, January 29, 2010

Doing my duty

Whew! It has been one exhausting week.

And that's saying a lot, considering I've been laying in bed for approximately 98 hours since the week started, and I have done nothing substantive that entire time.

Unless watching "Year One" is considered substantive.

No, I didn't think so.

Finding out about the gestational diabetes was obviously the biggie. We spent the three days between the diagnosis and our education meeting trying (basically in vain) to follow the appropriate diet without clear guidelines or feedback from a meter. And you can imagine how emotional it makes a poor double-preggo when you blindly mess with her food intake like that. I looked slightly less cuddly than the diabeetus cat:

Fortunately the meeting cleared up a lot of our questions and misconceptions about gestational diabetes, and now we have the meter to tell us how we are doing. For the record: we are kicking butt. (And I say "we" because it is a huge team effort between me and DH and my Mom.) The diet is not as bad as I had initially feared -- although I still maintain that whole grains are vastly inferior to the refined variety (who wouldn't prefer something that's refined? it sounds so sophisticated. ooh la la, look at me eating refined grains!) -- and so far at least, my diabetes seems to be easily controlled by diet. Yes, I am bitter that I can't have cake at my baby shower next weekend. Yes, I am even more bitter that I can't inhale a gigantic cookie cake on my 30th birthday. But I soothe myself by imagining how I will eventually make up for the weeks of sacrifice by turning my bathtub into a giant hot fudge sundae and rolling around in the sugary deliciousness while laughing insanely -- MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!



MUWAHAHAHA-- *ahem* Excuse me.

Then my cervix check was this morning, which always fills me with anxiety for at least a day in advance. It wasn't my favorite sonographer when we arrived, which made me even more nervous. But as soon as the screen came up, I knew we would be okay. It's holding fast and tight at 2.4 cm. Whew! High fives all around, and back home for another week. I did forget to ask the doc if I can stop the ibuprofen I'm taking, I'm so over it, but there's always next week.

Despite all the stress and worry this week, I've had moments where I have just been overcome with gratitude. Our situation at the moment is not ideal, that's for sure. But it's very temporary. And while I know there will be inevitable change and loss somewhere in our future, because that's the nature of life, I am so grateful for today. I have a devoted husband who still makes my heart flutter with giddiness after so many years. We are not rich, but we live a comfortable life. I have a healthy son with a gentle but playful spirit who brings joy to my every day. I have parents willing to sacrifice to care for me and my growing family without so much as a mutter, despite my own decisions to live so far away and get myself knocked up with twins. And as of this moment, I have two tiny babies wiggling in my belly, filled with all the promise of new life. It's much easier for most people to achieve a family than it has been for us. But this is our journey, and if it has to be this way, then I will gladly walk through the rough patches to earn my great blessings.

I know it's cheesy... but hey, I'm pregnant, remember? It's not so much my right to be emotional as my duty.

Now it's time to end this rollercoaster of a week. I'm ready to get back into the groove of laying around and spending quality time snuggled with something else I'm grateful for, my DVR. I have the season premiere of Psych waiting for me. I'm coming, Shawn!



Alyssa G said...

LOLCatz...yea you did!!

Kristina P. said...

Are you trying to make me angry with that LOL Cat? :)

I'm glad that overall, things are positive.

Jen said...

I'm with you on the whole grains thing. I had a bran muffin this morning. It wasn't great despite a calorie count that would have me think otherwise.

Jillian and I were eating pasta a couple weeks ago, when Jeramy informed me that Dr. Oz said that it was bad for you (especially with white sauce) and that we might as well eat pure sugar. That from the man who refuses to touch anything but white bread and drinks a few beers every night. I think the daytime TV is getting to him. I'm sure you can relate.

Enough about me. I'm trying my best to figure out how to make a low carb mac n cheese for you that doesn't taste low carb. Wish me luck.

AFD said...

I'm so glad to hear a positive report! Yay! Exuse me, I have to go get my son off of the train table.

Sarah said...

A bath tub of fudge followed by a swim in a great big pool of starched and refined noodles...

Always thinking of you guys! Sarah

OppositeOfOops said...

I JUST finished watching Psych a few moments ago.


Way sweeter than cake, anyway. :)

Mrs. Gamgee said...

Hmmmm... a bathtub sized fudge sundae. I like the thought of that. Throw in some brownies and I'm there with you!

Hang in there!

Coffeegrl said...

all that hot fudge sounds SOOOO good! Also, I miss Psych! I just finished catching up on Monk and now I need me some Psych-goodness!

jingle said...

what a positive and witty post.
As a matter of fact, it is a cute post.
I love the photo in nature...

You Have A Healthy, Merry, And
Witty Mindset, That is what counts...

lovely notes about your life and your future.

Expectant Duck said...

Glad that the appointment went well.

I track what I eat on a site called and it now has a diabetes tracker thing - and I thought of you! Seeing as you are on bedrest and have time on your hands it maybe of interest to you.

Alana said...

Glad things are going well, and loving the TEAM spirit with you, DH, and your Mom.

And big kudos to you for taking the time to count your blessings. :)

Celia said...

Keep chugging away! My handiest snack is having a dozen hard boiled, peeled eggs in the fridge. High protein, low carb, no fuss. I buy them in a bag already made at Trader Joes. Also, Celestial Seasonings makes a great tea called Cinnamon Apple Spice. You could almost believe it is hot apple cider. Plus, there is anecdotal evidence that cinnamon can help lower your blood sugar. I drink 2-3 cups a day.

Celia said...

Also, Dreamfields pasta is very good, and has less carbs.

Lisa said...

You are doing great Sunny! 98 hours lying down, my God, I can't even fathom it. But we do what we need to! I need to email you some of the great lower-carb/glycemic items that I eat as well. Keep moving towards that magical birth date!

Hollyween said...

Crap is right. I'm so sorry you have the dreaded GD. Horrid. I really didn't think you'd have it. REALLY DIDN'T!!!

I love reading all your updates on your cervix and TV happenings. It's okay to be a sloth when you're basically forced to. Maybe you'll at least FEEL less sloth-like when you can't have sugar.
Or... you might get really cranky and mean. One of the two.

Hang in there chick, and keep watching TV. We junkies need you.

Red said...

I am glad you have made it through another week with your positive attitude. Enjoy the TV watching!

Lollipop Goldstein said...

I was laughing through the whole opening of this post--especially refined grains. My mother keeps trying to get me to switch to whole wheat and I'm going quote this next time.

Michelle said...

YUMMY the tub full of a hot fudge sundae sounds great!!! I am glad you are feeling positive! :)

Oh and I love PSYCH!!!

momofonefornow said...

Hot fudge tub, mwuahahaha!!! That had me rolling! Glad you and the babies are hanging in there.

Eve said...

Oh I'm sorry. I'm following nicely in your footsteps, as I failed my one hour test this week. Next up, the dreaded 3 hour. I'm sure that will be a lot of tears on my part if I fail, as coping through donuts and homemade cakes are what is getting me through this pregnancy right now.

Wishing you stable sugar levels and a nice long cervix.

jingle said...

wishing YOU an unbeatable day.
I loved your winsome, handsome post all the way...

take good care,
speak of love,
receive love,
sweet dreams.

Furrow said...

Refined grains. Hee hee. Why did I never think of that?

I can't wait until you're able to slurp up a big chocolate milkshake while cuddling your new babies. Because let's face it, straws and other hands-free devices are going to be your friends for a while.

Michele said...

You are doing great!!!

When I had GD and we were talking about baby shower cake, my OB offered to give me enough insulin to cover a SMALL piece of cake. Perhaps an option if you really feel the need?

So proud of you (and your cervix!)

E said...

Thank you so much for commenting on my pity party blog about GD. I also go to get my cervix checked but mine is staying closed at 3.5 woot!! that is at least some good news. Are you on bedrest with a cervix of 2.5?

I was wondering, if you could give me any info at all about what your diabetic consilor said to eat? I don't get to see one for 2 weeks or so and I am going crazy sitting her wondering what the heck I should and what not to eat.

I just have no idea what to expect.

You can post on my blog or e-mail me at I would sooooo very appreciate it.

Thank you for posting.

Kristi said...

You are a rockstar mom for being pregnant with twins and having to stick to a gestational diabetes diet. Not fair in the slightest. But yes, it is temporary, even though I know you must be dying to cram in the cake. Only a few more months to go, and then you can make up for lost time. And if you're planning on nursing, you should be able to without worrying about calories!

Martha said...

I am so glad that you are taking good care of yourself physically and emotionally. Pysch is very funny, great taste in TV.

jingle said...

Yes, Kristi is right,
you are cool
although life is cruel,
you stay upright
and shine bright...

Enjoy An Evening As Excellent As Your Courage!


Anonymous said...

That cat picture is priceless! Take care of yourself and as you said you can have a giant hot fudge sundae made in your bathtub after the babies come. take care.
Gerardine Baugh